Wednesday, December 28, 2011

And then the counselor said...

When Cath said, "Bitch are you for real?!"
In the days following the confession, I just didn't feel anything except betrayed. My husband kept blathering on about his need to come clean and his our need for counseling.  Remember, he's already booked the appointment.  He called in sick those first days "because we needed to be together during this time".  Oh, I did feel something else...annoyed.

The counseling session was held in the offices of a lovely church.  Not our church, he we couldn't bear the scandal.  Furthered annoyed...If you're oh so wrapped up in the approval of our Beloved Lord and Savior, how did you even have the affair?! The counselor started with a prayer and words of comfort.  He then asked for our "stories".

Him:  The husband babbled on about his need to come clean, it being all his fault, he's soooo sorry, he doesn't really know why it happened, he's soooo sorry.

My turn...I decided to defer to the counselor, explaining that I didn't need to offer my story.  I hadn't screwed anyone or in any way betrayed my husband.  I'm just a spectator in his need for counseling.

Counselor:  "Your husband is obviously hurt, ashamed, and sorry.  Counseling is a step in the right direction.  It shows that he is contrite. These things happened because of pride and him not having the resolve to say no to the attention and to the situation.  He also has issues that stem from childhood, always wanting the please his mother."

Okay, let me have a "do over" for my turn: "Sure, he has mother issues. I could fill a whole book on he and his mother but, she didn't take his penis and screw anybody with it.  Actually, she hated the whore(Whore is a word in the bible~I'm comfortable using it in a church with a christian counselor.) As for pride, that should have kept him from doing this, especially with her.  SHE HAD SEX WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. We're talking about a man who has done very well in life and his career. She's married and divorced her current husband three times over the past 18 years. There has to be more to this story, like maybe he just never got over her.  He just needs to admit to that, divide our shit assets, and move the fuck on."

Counselor: "MayBeth, I can see and understand that you're hurt.  Your husband loves you and wants to move on with a life with you.  GOD prefers that you not divorce, but that you come together in love and forgiveness.  I can put you in touch with a counselor, if you'd like to start fresh with private counseling."

Me: "If I'm not mistaken there is a situation that GOD will allow divorce...Adultery."

Counselor: "Let us pray." (Seriously)